Today is my last day at my old job. And it is bittersweet.
I’ve been with my current company for just over three years. I’ve been the assistant to five different financial advisors in two different offices throughout that time. Most recently, I have a great boss and have become fast friends with another coworker and I am definitely sad to leave them. But the job? No, I don’t really think I will miss that much. It was slow, quiet work most days and I wasn’t even full-time.
And this is the first time I have ever quit a job where it was entirely of my own freewill. Previously, it has been due to relocation and major life changes that had spurred job changes. It was strange for me to leave a perfectly fine job for something better. Better pay. Better benefits. More hours. A faster pace environment. More responsibility. Something that will help us reach our goals and keep my sanity.
It’s a strange, but very liberating thing. It makes me believe that I actually control my own destiny. The past few years in my job, I have felt like I’m settling. I first took the job after a bout of unemployment. And ever since then, I’ve just been thankful that I had a job in this economy. I have been drifting along in my life. And if I am completely honest, it has been affecting my relationship and home life.
Having a real job now, a full-time job, with real benefits and bringing home a substantially larger paycheck makes me feel like I’m contributing more to our household. I feel like less of a sloth, less of a deadweight.
And I know, I haven’t been deadweight. I contribute in other ways – by getting up early every morning with my husband and packing him a lunch and cooking him a hot meal, by taking care of the dog, by doing the grocery shopping and meal planning. But it really was never enough in my mind. My not-great job didn’t have paid time off so it was difficult to vacation. My not-great job didn’t pay well so we couldn’t really afford to do a lot of fun things. My not-great job. I haven’t had a lot of self worth lately and my self confidence is down the toilet. And it’s been a strain. And I’ve been tired of feeling this way so I took charge.
I got more serious with my haphazard job searching. And from the minute I found the ad, it felt right. And when I talked to the office manager, it felt right. And I liked the office. And my interviews went really well even though I was pretty sick. And it all happened very quickly and I didn’t doubt my decision to accept their offer. But boy, did I dread giving my notice. And now, with two weeks of part-time training under my belt at the new job, I am more confident than ever that this was the right decision for me. For my family. And for my future.
And I am so excited about what that future holds.